Obsessing over health, healing, & self-growth may prevent us from going deeper. Pursuing a state of pure wellness is not our real work. Here’s why I’m leaving the culture of nonstop self-improvement.
So true. Even the term “self-improvement” can be problematic. The implication is that our current self isn’t good enough, and we have to keep working to make it better, fix its flaws, etc.
What we really need to do is rediscover and love the authentic self buried under layers of familial and societal conditioning.
We are taught, starting at a very young age, that expressing certain emotions and questioning what we are told is unacceptable. Love is conditional, and our worth is determined by what we do, not who we are. So our efforts to recover and love ourselves become more things we must do properly in order to win others’ approval and be worthy of respect. They become one more way we don’t measure up and we feel worse instead of better.
Absolutely agree. Thanks for sharing your words and insights Jake.
I like what you said about purity wellness. The dominant narrative has somehow arrived at this idea that once “healed”, life wont continue to touch us in ways that feel painful or challenging. That denies our innate humanity of what it means to be alive.
The Serenity Prayer comes to mind…and the wisdom to know the difference of what can be changed and what can’t. Can I get an Amen?! Great thoughts, Jake. Thanks.
So true. Even the term “self-improvement” can be problematic. The implication is that our current self isn’t good enough, and we have to keep working to make it better, fix its flaws, etc.
What we really need to do is rediscover and love the authentic self buried under layers of familial and societal conditioning.
We are taught, starting at a very young age, that expressing certain emotions and questioning what we are told is unacceptable. Love is conditional, and our worth is determined by what we do, not who we are. So our efforts to recover and love ourselves become more things we must do properly in order to win others’ approval and be worthy of respect. They become one more way we don’t measure up and we feel worse instead of better.
Wise words, Wendi! I couldn’t agree more.
Absolutely agree. Thanks for sharing your words and insights Jake.
I like what you said about purity wellness. The dominant narrative has somehow arrived at this idea that once “healed”, life wont continue to touch us in ways that feel painful or challenging. That denies our innate humanity of what it means to be alive.
Whew! Oh yeah. That resonates for sure.
The Serenity Prayer comes to mind…and the wisdom to know the difference of what can be changed and what can’t. Can I get an Amen?! Great thoughts, Jake. Thanks.
Thanks Donna! Amen. 😊
WOW Jake, just WOW!!!
Thank you for articulating this wisdom.
Thank you for reading, Dana! I appreciate the affirmation of my work.